Good Lord I havet touched this thing in nearly a MONTH!! Well, in a nutshell...
I'm gradually coming out of my shell... over hte past month my social life has grown quite a bit, and I'm out to roughly 15 people. Around the middle of October, I started seeing Jason... whos a friend of Caleb. We got along okay, and after three weeks or so, we were doing all that boyfriend stuff... kissing/makeing out/cuddling/holding hands, etc... Well most of that was peachy-keen, but over the coures of those few weeks, we slowly realized that we were really too different for each other. Okay now that I'm skipping ALL OVER the place... I first saw Jason when he was visiting Caleb here in the dorms... I mean I dont want to sound like some kind of man-whore or anything, but I know that Jason came over here from Toledo, and that hes lived here in CdA for quite a bit. But I dont know how he knows Caleb or any of his friends here in the dorms... At any rate, I saw Jason and Caleb together quite a few times... Jason and I would throw stares at each other every now and then... sort of saying "yeah I'm here... ya gonna do somethin'?"... Turns out that Jason and Caleb had a little ill-fated fling... Caleb told me on AOL that Jason wasnt for him, so I pretty much got Jason in order to get him off of Calebs back. So one day Jason and Caleb are outside smoking, and Caleb basically took Jasons hand and mine and made us shake hands! Later on that night, Jason and I went walking around town, and things pretty much went from there.
uuuuugh... not touching this thing in a month makes for one HELL of an update... so thats why things are REALLY general and vague, k? hehe...
Anyway, so over the next few weeks, Jason and I got closer and closer together... I was introduced to his younger brother (whoa hold up... Jason is 20, but he looks 17... his brother, Brian, is 18, but he looks 20), who is a REAL ass... amazing that guy even has a girlfriend if you ask me... And Jason brought me over to some of his other friend's houses here in town, who are gay of course
Yahuh, and I said I was going to update this thing more often?? Well there are a few things going on right now... so in a nutshell:
· I'm going to meet up w/ Casey tomorrow · some other boy issues... · midterms · this Glade plug in is smelling like soggy Fruit Loops (sorry, random though!) · NIC's network in the dorm won't allow computers with Windows XP to log on, so because of that I'm using my family's NetZero dial-up internet *boo*...
So tomorrow after I get back from Spokane, and finish up on some homework, I'll whip up a larger post!
Holy freaking shit its been what... almost 3 weeks!! My last post was on the 15th, and actually 2 days beforehand I met up with Casey (guy up here in Spokane)... I'll slap something up about that... soon...
My guy situation is still a drama production... guys saying that they're not looking for b/fs (no biggie, I'm not really looking for one either right now), guys who are just plain asses (see below for one example) and some who are just flat out not interested in me. I also got a work study job in the SUB, and an actual paying job *yay* here at the dorms. Nothing too fancy, but hey I get some dough out of it. And I PROMISE to update this thing more!! I've been hellishly busy lately, and when I'm not I just dont have the modivation to update this thing *fie on you Mike, fie on you!!*
Now for one of the guys whos being an ass with me... Well I talked to Jesse on AOL a bit ago... and needless to say he's really mad at me, just because I was being blunt (perhaps a bit too blunt) with him...
*Jesse's SN* (7:59:15 PM): hi JunoSurvivor (7:59:19 PM): hey :-) JunoSurvivor (7:59:51 PM): got all my homework done *woohoo* Jesse (8:00:02 PM): kewl JunoSurvivor (8:01:26 PM): friends still there? Jesse (8:01:35 PM): damnit you lil mother fucker! call me Jesse (8:01:37 PM): sorry Jesse (8:01:37 PM): lol Jesse (8:01:39 PM): i hadda say it Jesse (8:01:40 PM): no Jesse (8:01:44 PM): they just left a lil while ago JunoSurvivor (8:01:56 PM): hehe... I see... Jesse (8:02:08 PM): call me call me call me call me JunoSurvivor (8:02:31 PM): actually... theres somehting I wanted to talk to you on AOL about, if you can stay on Jesse (8:02:48 PM): oh Jesse (8:02:48 PM): ok Jesse (8:02:50 PM): what is it? JunoSurvivor (8:03:09 PM): and I'm being hellishly blunt when I say this... k Jesse (8:03:36 PM): oh shit Jesse (8:03:57 PM): you never wanna talk to me again? JunoSurvivor (8:04:03 PM): pretty much the main reason why I dont see us being together is that... basically you're not bf material for me Jesse (8:04:42 PM): you never wanna talk to me again... in other words JunoSurvivor (8:04:52 PM): no, thats not what I'm saying Jesse (8:05:00 PM): yea.. Jesse (8:05:01 PM): it is Jesse (8:05:05 PM): im gonna go JunoSurvivor (8:05:10 PM): I'm saying that we can be friends, but I really dont see us as bfs Jesse signed off at 8:05:10 PM. Previous message was not received by Jesse because of error (8:05:10 PM): User Jesse is not available.
Jesse signed on at 8:07:37 PM. Jesse (8:07:48 PM): i would have thought you woulda blovked me JunoSurvivor (8:08:01 PM): no... I was going say that that we can be friends, but I really dont see us as bfs JunoSurvivor (8:08:18 PM): and I wouldnt block you b/c you're one of the few ppl in the area who actually talk to me Jesse (8:08:36 PM): well Jesse (8:09:08 PM): i dont know if i wanna talk to you anymore mike... sayin that im not bf material when ive had more relationships than youll EVER have just isnt right Jesse (8:09:13 PM): hows that for blunt JunoSurvivor (8:09:24 PM): and what I said is the main reason why I was hesitant on you giving me a bj JunoSurvivor (8:10:05 PM): I'm sure that you'll be a great bf with someone else, but maybe not w/ me Jesse (8:10:11 PM): mike Jesse (8:10:20 PM): when i said i wanted to give you head, i was being asracastic JunoSurvivor (8:10:32 PM): k well I didnt know that JunoSurvivor (8:11:23 PM): but I dont want you to blow up on me b/c of what I said.... JunoSurvivor (8:11:52 PM): I mean its best that I tell you now than to tell you later on, if and when things did become more serious that what they already are JunoSurvivor (8:13:34 PM): I'm not holding it against you, and I hope that you'll do the same Jesse (8:16:22 PM): mike Jesse (8:16:30 PM): what is there to hold against you Jesse (8:16:35 PM): its a small town Jesse (8:16:43 PM): with few people Jesse (8:16:49 PM): and limited gay guys Jesse (8:17:02 PM): and im leaving it soon anyway JunoSurvivor (8:17:04 PM): I mean hold what I said against me Jesse (8:17:09 PM): so why would i care JunoSurvivor (8:20:39 PM): :-\ k now I feel really odd... Jesse (8:21:09 PM): you feel odd how? JunoSurvivor (8:21:29 PM): I just feel like youre really pissed off at me now :-\ Jesse (8:22:14 PM): hmm, i wonder why JunoSurvivor (8:22:51 PM): c'mon... ppl back home have done it to me too... I dont totally forget about them but I just keep what they said in mind JunoSurvivor (8:23:16 PM): the first person... the very first person... that I met online who lived in Boise did htat to me w/o ever talking or meeting me in person Jesse (8:23:40 PM): uh, mike Jesse (8:23:45 PM): b4 you go making assuptions Jesse (8:23:52 PM): maybe you should let me tell you this Jesse (8:23:59 PM): im not mad cuz of what you said Jesse (8:24:03 PM): i mad cuz you said it Jesse (8:24:10 PM): peple have said it to me b4 Jesse (8:24:24 PM): i wouldnt be mad if you had said it in a different way Jesse (8:24:25 PM): but Jesse (8:24:32 PM): sayung that im not bf materail Jesse (8:24:34 PM): thats like Jesse (8:24:38 PM): a killer for me Jesse (8:24:40 PM): so JunoSurvivor (8:24:43 PM): k well I really didnt know how to say it Jesse (8:24:55 PM): think about what you say, unless you don tmind getting your face beat in Jesse (8:25:16 PM): its really simple Jesse (8:25:19 PM): all you say JunoSurvivor (8:25:19 PM): its something thats been on my mind for a few days, and I really didnt know how to say it w/o being so blunt Jesse (8:25:28 PM): "i dont like you that way" JunoSurvivor (8:25:50 PM): k... well I dont like you that way Jesse (8:26:02 PM): dont worry JunoSurvivor (8:26:05 PM): as a friend yes, but not anything more than that Jesse (8:26:12 PM): you made that VERY clear JunoSurvivor (8:27:22 PM): well... I'm sorry that what/how I said it struck you wrong, but still I though it was something that I needed to get off my chest before anything ever did happen between us JunoSurvivor (8:27:56 PM): and I wasnt my intention to piss you off, but I didn;t know how a gentle way for me to tell you would be JunoSurvivor (8:30:00 PM): I wasnt aware of what all had happened in your past, and I;m sorry for what did happen and what I just did JunoSurvivor (8:30:18 PM): and its not your fault for not telling me because its none of my business JunoSurvivor (8:30:53 PM): but I just dont know the threshold that ppl have, so sometimes when I'm being bluntly honest, ppl do get mad at me JunoSurvivor (8:31:42 PM): and to be honest Brandon told me the same thing, but he said it even more blunt that what I did a few minutes ago Jesse (8:31:45 PM): your being blunt is nothing compared to me being blunt JunoSurvivor (8:34:46 PM): if you want to hate me for the rest of my life thats up to you, but thats really all I hvae to say Jesse (8:36:40 PM): k, DID I SAY I WAS GONNA HATE YOU? JunoSurvivor (8:36:57 PM): no, but its just a gut feeling that I have JunoSurvivor (8:37:38 PM): and I said "if"... I never said you were Jesse (8:39:21 PM): are you gonna get technical with me? Jesse (8:39:26 PM): i really dont that would be a good idea Jesse (8:39:31 PM): cuz then i really WILL hat you Jesse (8:39:33 PM): hate JunoSurvivor (8:39:45 PM): I'm not being technical Jesse (8:39:55 PM): JunoSurvivor (8:27:55 PM): and I said "if"... I never said you were JunoSurvivor (8:40:51 PM): yes I know I said that JunoSurvivor (8:41:52 PM): ugh... now I really feel like an ass... JunoSurvivor (8:43:11 PM): ...Jesse? Auto Response from *Jesse's SN*: IF YOUR CAMERON OR CHRIS, CALL ME!!! IM WATCHING QUEEN OF THE DAMNED, SO... YEA... just CALL!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Last night my hard drive somehow got formatted... so I lost EVERYTHING!! Photos, emails, some instant messages, *ahem* some... other... stuff... So needless to say I was and still am REALLY pissed off!! I have WinXP back on, so I'm recovering slowly, but that can't bring the past back, huh??
So, Mikes golden rule for the day iiiiis... BACK UP YOUR STUFF!!!!!
